


Run Away to the Circus

by sushisama



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe, Humanstuck - kind of?, M/M, Xenophilia, circusstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-15
Updated: 2013-03-15
Packaged: 2017-12-05 09:26:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/721487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sushisama/pseuds/sushisama
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gamzee is just a clown from a traveling circus.  He doesn't have a regular life, and he's all right with that.  Until he meets a norm named Tavros, and he finds he could use some normal in his life.  GamTav, AU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Run Away to the Circus

**Author's Note:**

> This was one of my first Gamtav fanfictions, but I've always been fond of it, though I write completely differently now. Hope you all enjoy it. }:)

Your name is Gamzee Makara, and you are doing what you can to avoid your mother fucking father. He's called a meeting among all the performers of the Alternia, and you just aren't up to hearing his shit tonight. It wasn't like you could put in much input anyway: your dad never listens to anything you have to say, and he's quick to dismiss any ideas you come up with for marketing or improving acts. So, tonight, instead of listening him drone on and on, arguing with the ringmaster and promoter, you've absconded to the woods on the other side of the camp the big top is set up at. It's not the first time you've ducked out of a gathering, and it probably wouldn't be the last.

You wander around the forest for a while, just enjoying the night. The moon is out, big and beautiful, and full of fucking miracles, and you love how the trees, though thick, still open up at the tops to reveal its light. You keep staring up at the sky and all those twinkling stars, completely distracted.

You're brought back to reality when you trip over a root and don't have the time to break your fall. Your face meets the ground in a very unpleasant fashion, and the knock to your horns sends a wave of pain down your spine. You curse loudly as you pick yourself up. You bring a hand to your face when you feel a drop down your cheek, and there's blood on your fingers when you look at it. Fuck, the cut's going to be a bitch to put your face paint over.

There's a snap of a twig somewhere to your side, and you turn to catch what made the noise. You can see someone's shadow with the aid of the moonlight. "What mother fucker is there?"

You hear a whimper and more rustling, and whoever it is is about to turn and run. "No need to fucking up and leave and shit. I can outrun you."

There's silence. Finally, the figure comes closer, stepping out from behind the tree he'd half-hid behind. "Umm... you don't... you don't have to chase me or anything, I was just surprised someone else was out here..."

The voice was timid, very shy and unsure, but definitely male. He kept to the shadows still, and you can only see his outline including the tuft of messy hair on top of his head. It takes him a few moments to work up the courage to come out fully into the moonlight. When he does, you see he's just some normal teenager (and by normal, you mean not a freak like you), with a light brown mohawk and amber eyes. He's wearing a simple hoodie and some regular black pants.

"I... um. You okay?" he asks, the nervousness still in his voice.

"What? Why wouldn't this mother fucker be okay?"

"You, umm... have a bit of... blood..." He pulls out a piece of cloth from his pocket and approaches you slowly. You back up at of habit, and he stops quickly enough. He's blushing as he holds up the handkerchief to you. "Sorry... I just... um..."

You hesitantly take the offered linen and use it to rub at the cut on your cheek. When you've got it all, you don't know if you should hand it back or not, but he doesn't look like he's expecting it. Though it's hard to tell what he looks like when his face is turned away from you, still flushed.

"Thanks, mother fucker," you say.

He flicks his gaze up to you, still unsure whether to fully look at you or not. "No problem," he finally says. "Umm... so, I didn't think anyone else came out this way..."

You shrug. You pocket the handkerchief without thought. "Just wandering around, avoiding mother fucking work."

"Where do you work?"

"You know the circus that just up and came in?" He nods. "Yeah, those mother fuckers."

"Is... is that why you're wearing the face paint?"

You always forget when you're wearing the white face: after years of putting it on the moment you wake up and wearing it all day, it's become a second skin to you, and you're always around people that don't think anything different about it, so it just doesn't come to mind anymore.

You're more surprised that he hasn't questioned your gray skin or the horns protruding from your head, but you're grateful he isn't screaming about it and calling you a monster.

You pull out a few multi-coloured rubber balls from your pocket, juggling them a moment before catching them all and smirking. "Wouldn't be much of a clown without it, y'know?"

He chuckles, a soft sound that's almost melodic. "I always thought clowns were kind of creepy, but you're..."

You raise an eyebrow as he trails off. "I'm what?"

He blushes, looking to the tips of his shoes. "I don't know... umm... cute? I mean, oh god, not that- not that you aren't cute or anything! I just meant more, well, I don't know, but not-"

"Calm your tits, bro," you reassure him, putting on hand on his shoulder. He quiets instantly, and you can tell his face is bright red. He is just too fucking precious. "What's your name, mother fucker?"

He tilts his head up to look at you, the blush on his cheeks radiating toward his neck. "Umm... Tavros. What's yours?"

You smile at him. "Gamzee mother fucking Makara."

"Umm, well... it's good to meet you, Gamzee."

"Good to meet you, too, Tavbro." You withdraw your hand, and you can see him getting a little more comfortable. "What are you doing out here?"

"I just like to walk around the woods," he answers. He looks around, smiling at the scenery around him. "I... well, I like wildlife, you know? I like to try my luck at finding animals and... god, that sounds so lame, nevermind..."

"I think it sounds kind of mother fucking cool," you tell him. He smiles some.

You two get to talking after that about all sorts of things, your life on the road, his life as a student. He doesn't sound happy whenever he talks about school, but it also doesn't sound like he has a lot of friends, so that could be why. He eventually asks you about your skin and horns, and you tell him it's real, you're a freak, just like your father, but it works for the circus life. He doesn't seem weirded out by it, more curious than anything else.

At some point, you both realise how late it is. You're already going to get in trouble with your father, so you could care less how long you stay out, but he seems to be anxious about displeasing his own parental unit. Despite talking about going, he seems reluctant to end any of your conversations.

The two of you had started walking around at some point, finding your way from the trees to a small clearing circled by the woods. There's a log in the middle that you two have made a seat out of as you've chatted.

"So how long are you guys in town?"

You shrug. "We up and leave at different times, but I think the mother fucking promoter said a month this time around."

"You... um... you think you'll be able to maybe... come back and see me?" He blushes the moment the words are out of his mouth. "Not that you have to, especially if you don't have time..."

You smirk. "I think I can come see a mother fucker that wants my attention." You scoot a little closer to him, until your shoulders are brushing. "I have a fee for my time, though."

He raises an eyebrow, a questioning look on his face. "W-what kind of fee?"

"You give this mother fucker a kiss every time I come see you."

His whole face lights up, and he hides behind his hands. "A... a kiss?"

You nod, though he can't see it. "I don't think it's too much to ask a mother fucker for, right?"

He peeks over his fingers at you, timidly. "J-just one kiss?" You nod. "Each time you see me?" You nod again. "I... I guess I can do that."

You grin. "It starts tonight, though, Tav," you tell him.

"You want one right now?"

If this kid was more uncertain, he would explode. "All up and now."

Tavros seems to consider this for a moment, then he slowly takes his hand from his face. "O...okay." You turn more fully to him and lean forward. He leans in, and as he does, you pucker up slightly and close your eyes. But the kiss never comes, not on your lips anyway. He gives you a quick peck on your right cheek before pulling away again.

"Hey, mother fucker, what was that?"

He smiles sheepishly. "You just said 'a kiss,'" he says. "You never said where."

"Can I rephrase the mother fucking deal then?"

"Nope!" He giggles. "But, you know, maybe later... you'll get one, who knows?" He winks, trying to be sassy, but the blush and uncertain look make it hard to take him seriously.

Your grin returns. "Guess I'll just have to keep up and coming back, huh?"

He smiles, getting up from the log. "See you tomorrow night, right here, right?"

You nod. "After my show, sure thing, mother fucker."

"Have a good night, Gamzee!" he calls, waving as he runs off into the woods.

You wave after him, a smile still lingering on yours lips. You know you're going to get chewed out the moment you get back, but it was totally worth it.

**::*~~*::**

The moment the show is over the next night, you're making your get away. You did extra well tonight, just so your dad can't say anything to you when all of the audience is gone. It takes you longer than you'd thought to find the clearing with the log, but when you do, you find Tavros already sitting on the piece of wood with a book in his hand. The light of the moon was still bright, so he could just use it to read.

You don't make your presence known right away, instead opting to sneak around behind him. You creep up on him, right until you're almost on him. You whisper in his ear, "Boo!"

He starts, yelling and falling from his spot and dropping his back. He lands ungracefully on the ground, his breath coming out in pants. You're laughing as he's glaring at you.

"Gamzee!" he exclaims. "What the hell!?"

"Just wanted to see what a mother fucker would do if I scared him," you answer, crossing your arms over the log and leaning forward to look at him on the ground. "I like the way you look down there, looks all precious and shit."

He rolls his eye, standing up and retrieving his book. He puts it in one of the pockets in his cargo pants before he turns back to you. "You ass. How was your show?"

You shrug. "Full of fucking miracles." You grin. "What were you reading?"

"Oh! Umm... Peter Pan, actually..." He blushes, rubbing the back of his neck, like he's embarrassed. You have no idea why.

"What's that mother fucker about?"

He gapes at you a moment. "You... you've never heard of Peter Pan!?" He looks shocked, like it's the most appalling thing ever. "How can you not have heard of Peter Pan?"

"...I grew up in a mother fucking circus? Not exactly all up on its education and shit."

"Oh. Wow." He looks disbelieving for a moment. "Well, did... do you want me to tell you about it?"

"Yeah, sure. If it's interesting to an interesting mother fucker, then it should be interesting to this mother fucker."

He looks confused for a second, circling your words, before going on. He starts talking about the book, and it holds your attention rather well, if only because you can make a parallel to your life with it. These 'Wild Boys' or whatever just sound like the kids that have in the past come to the circus in hopes of never growing up.  The reality was harsh on them, but for some people it worked. Very few, though.

Most of your night is spent talking about different books that Tavros has read. Anything to do with this Pan fellow, he knows everything about, including books written by other people about him. You ask about others, and he tells you about Alice and Harry and others. At one point you're not really listening to learn, but to hear him talk. His voice is pleasant to listen to, and you find yourself just staring at him, memorising all of his features.

Like his nose, it's a button nose, and it fits him so well. He's grown, you know he's eighteen (he mentioned it at some point, that he only has about two months of school left), but he seems so young in spirit. When he laughs or smiles, he has dimples that are absolutely adorable, and you find yourself doing various tricks from your clown arsenal to get him to smile. He's really thin, like he doesn't eat enough, but you're no better. You're just taller than he is, so it looks right on you where it's noticeable on his smaller stature.

He's excitable when he talks about things he likes. He gestures with his hands and everything. At some point, he gets on his love of animals, and he mentions he can talk to them, but clams up about it just as fast. He gets embarrassed easy, which is just precious. Every time you make a lewd comment, he blushes and hides his face. He's cute, and he's interesting, and you just want to know more about him, but at some point you both have to leave. Your dad is expecting you back and he has school in the morning.

You reluctantly say your goodbyes, but before he can leave, you pull on his hand until he's in your arms. He catches himself by putting his hands on your chest, but he doesn't push you. He looks up at you, blushing.

"My fee, bro," you tell him, smiling coolly.

He smiles slowly, almost uncertainly. "Of course..." He tilts his head up and kisses your left cheek. He pulls away, waving before running off until the woods.

You wonder how many of these visits before he'll kiss you properly.

**::*~~*::**

The two of you keep up your visits for several days. After each of your shows, you rush to the clearing to meet him, and he's always waiting for you. You spend most of the time talking, but sometimes you bring things from the circus to entertain him with, and he brings his iPod to introduce you to music (he listens to a lot of rap, something you're also pretty fond of). He gives you a couple of books, and you read them during the day (as well as you can, anyway, some of the words you don't understand, but if you ask, he tells you what it means).

Each time you try to get your 'fee' from him, he kisses you in different areas of your face or your hands, all avoiding your lips. He's being a tease, and you know it, and he knows it, but you're okay with that. It keeps you coming back, and you wonder if that's the reason he's doing it. Whatever it is, you love spending time with him, so you'll deal with his almost-kisses.

During the day, you spend the hours thinking about him and what the two of you will do when you go to see him. It's distracting, and you can't keep your head into your practice or even your act. Your dad's starting to notice, but you don't care. He'll make a fuss about it, but you'll deal with it when it comes up.

It's been a little over a week since you two first met, and the moon is waxing, lessening the light you get to see him by. You have to bring a flashlight with you now, if only to find where you're going. He's waiting for you like always, but this time he isn't alone. Well, not exactly, anyway.

There's a little furry animal in his hands, and you watch him a moment. He's talking to it, and it chatters back at him, and you think they're holding a conversation, they're talking to each other, and were you a normal person, you'd think it was the craziest thing you'd ever seen, but you were born with horns, so there's not really anything normal about you.

You crack a twig as you shift your feet, alerting them both to your presence. They turn their heads toward you, and the little furry thing (you think it's a chipmunk, you can't be sure with this low light) absconds. He watches after it but doesn't make a move to stop its escape. He turns back to you, and when you flick your flashlight on and point it near his head, you can tell he's blushing.

"Um, hey, Gamz... That was... I mean..."

"So, the reason you like the animals is because you can talk to the mother fuckers?" you ask, stepping into the clearing and sitting next to him on the log.

"Y-yeah..." He looks away.

"That's pretty cool and shit."

He looks back up at you slowly. "You think so?"

You nod. "Yeah, shit, you'd be a great fucking animal tamer!"

He laughs. "Wasn't really what I was thinking about, but I suppose it's an option." He lays his head on your shoulder, smiling. He's become so comfortable around you. "Got any plans for tonight?"

"Hmm. Want to go for a mother fucking swim?" There was a lake nearby, it wasn't too deep and still pretty hidden.

"Swim? But we don't have swim trunks or anything..."

"You don't go swimming all up in your birthday suit?" The night was warm, a dip would feel great.

"You do?" he retorts.

You shake him off your shoulder and pull him with you toward the lake. "C'mon," you tell him as you drag him along. At first he seems reluctant, but he follows you willingly soon enough.

When you guys get to the lakeside, you're quick to start stripping. You're in the water quickly enough, splashing around. It takes you a moment to get over your excitement (you love being in the water, but you rarely ever get this kind of freedom) to notice you're alone. You turn to the shoreline where Tavros is still standing on a rock jutting out, fully clothed and eying the water suspiciously.

"What the fuck you waiting for?" you yell to him. "Get your streak on and get in here!"

"Gamzee, I don't... I don't really feel comfortable, you know..."

You smile at him, trying to look as reassuring as you can. "The water's fucking miraculous, brother. You need to get up on this shit, it's great."

"I don't think-"

"C'mon, Tavbro!" you urge again. You swim up to the rock he's sitting on, looking up at him with big, indigo eyes. "Please? For your favourite mother fucker?"

He kneels down so you two are closer, face-to-face. "Who says you're my favourite... umm, mother fucker?"

You reach a wet hand out of the water to stroke the side of his face. He doesn't flinch as you pull him down some so your foreheads touch. You look him in the eyes, and he looks so flustered. "Are you saying I'm fucking not?"

He hesitates a moment before he leans in, kissing you right below your left eye. "I don't know yet." He leans back, and you let him slip from your fingers. Your smile drops a little bit as he pulls away from you. "But... that's not to say you won't be..." He blushes, you can see it with the light reflecting off the water. "Just... do me a favour? Turn around?"

You grin up at him. "Sure thing, bro." You turn around and swim a little away from the rock, listening to the sound of rustling cloth. A moment later, you hear him slip into the water, the waves sloshing against him. "Can I look now?"

"Y-yeah..."

You turn to him, and he's still leaning against the rock, hugging himself. He looks unsure of himself, like if he could disappear into the stone behind him, he would.

You swim over to him and take his hands, pulling him further into the water.

"It's not the bad," you tell him.

"It's not that... I just... you know, never skinny-dipped or anything... Just kind of..." As you two are getting into the deeper water, he seems to get more nervous, holding onto your upper arms. "I'm not that great at swimming, actually..."

"Don't worry," you say to him in a low voice. You pull him closer, keeping him up in your arms. "I'm not going to let anything all up and happen to you, Tav."

He looks away from you, embarrassed at how close your bodies are. "I... I know you won't..." He tucks his head under your jaw. "I trust you, Gamz..."

You hug him tightly to you, enjoying the feel of him so close. You spend the rest of the time taking him around the lake, either holding him or getting into the shallow end to have a splash fight. You both stay longer than normal, which tomorrow will get you in trouble, but you don't think about it at all.

When he leaves, he kisses you on the cheek again, the first time he gives you more than one kiss at night.

**::*~~*::**

"Can I touch your horns?"

The question catches you off guard. It's been about two and a half weeks now, and you're leaned up against the log, and he was laying his head in your lap until he sat up, giving you a dead serious look before he asked. You blink at him for a moment.

"I guess if a mother fucker wants to, sure."

He smiles as he resituates himself on your lap, straddling your hips so he can get a better reach. You put your hands on his hips to keep him balanced. He raises up a little bit and you lean your head down a smidgen so it's easier for him. His fingers are tentative, and you almost don't feel it at first, but you know he's playing with the tip of your right horn.

"I didn't think it'd be this rough," he observes, running his finger down the length. As he gets closer to the base where you have more feeling, you shudder. You try to hold it back, but it's hard when he's manhandling your horns.

Oh, god, that brought the wrong kind of thoughts to your head. You're glad he's not really seated on your lap, else he might feel the twitch of life in your nether regions. You stare forward, right at his chest, trying your best not to think about how good this feels.

"What did you expect the mother fuckers to feel like?" you ask, trying to stay away from the images in your head.

"I guess... smoother." He grips the base of your left horn lightly, moving his thumb up the ridge. You can't help the low noise coming from the back of your throat. Does he know what he's doing to you? He has to, fucking tease he is...

"Tav..." you mutter, fisting your hands into the front of his shirt.

He has both of your horns now, and he pulls your head forward a little more until his face is buried in your hair. He nuzzles the tangled strands for a moment, and then he's turning his head until his lips are over the junction where your horn meets your skull, and he kisses you right there where you're most sensitive. A wave of electricity runs down your spine, and you can't stop the moan that comes from your you. He tilts his head so he can kiss you on the same spot on your other horn, sending the same sensation over you.

Tavros nestles down into your lap, and there is no way he can't feel your raising problem, but you feel the beginning of his, and that makes it somewhat better. He threads his fingers in the hair at the back of your head, and he looks at you with those soft amber eyes, half-lidded.

"I want my mother fucking fee," you tell him.

He blushes. "I... I think I just gave you your fee."

"Price just went all and up," you say, leaning in until your foreheads touch.

He giggles sheepishly. "I don't know if I can afford it..."

"Oh, I think you can." You tilt just the bit you need, but he's moving, too, and he meets you half-way, your lips meeting for the first time. It's slow and careful, and he stiffens up just slightly. It doesn't last long, just enough for you to know his lips are chapped and taste vaguely of peanut butter.

He leans back just a bit so he can look you in the eyes, his face red. "I... Was that... good enough for your fee?" He smiling playfully.

You make a 'tsk'ing noise. "Well, it just meets the mother fucking price, you could always go up and shit, pay a little more..."

He considers it for a moment before leaning in again, kissing you once more. You kiss back instantly, and he's more relaxed this time, almost melting into you. You move your hands to his back, pulling him closer to you. His arms fall around your neck as you two continue moving against each others lips. You bite at his lower lip, opening his mouth so you can slide your tongue into the velvety cavity. He almost pulls away, and your grip is loose enough that you'd let him, but he stops, pushing himself forward again. His tongue, which was laying dormant, starts to move against yours.

As he responds, you kiss him more passionately, gripping into his shirt and keeping him close to you. You're disappointed when he moves away, but you both need air, you suppose. The moment you feel you have enough oxygen, you kiss him again, just as heated, and he's more eager to kiss you back now that he's gotten the swing of things. One of his hands is back in your hair, playing with the strands. He gets a little more bold as he goes on, biting your tongue and lips affectionately.  
You pull away once more when you're in need of air again. You start laying kisses on his face and chin, moving to his neck. You graze the exposed flesh with your sharp teeth. He makes a sound, and you feel it against your mouth.

"Um, Gamzee... be... be careful with those, okay?"

You glance up at him a moment, smirking. "Not afraid I'm going to up and eat you, are you?"

Tavros puts a hand on your chest to push you away some. "Why would you say that? I wasn't even thinking about it, oh my god."

You don't let him go far, holding him fast in your grip. You easily pull him back to you, resuming your nibbling on his neck, softly. "I could mother fucking eat you..." You pull the collar of his shirt down some to give you better access to his shoulder, and bite down on him, gently, not enough to break skin, but you know your fangs are still going to leave a bruise. "Maybe you'd enjoy it, Tav..."

He moans as you continue on the one spot, arcing his back some. "G-Gamzee..."

You lean him back until he's flat on the ground and you're looming over him, moving over the exposed skin of his throat, nipping and kissing as you go. He twitches with each move of your mouth, little noises coming out of him. You get a hand under his shirt, pushing it up and feeling the skin underneath. He really is skinny, you can feel his ribs easily, but you don't make a comment on it. You move your lips down, over his chest and stomach. His hands are in your hair, curling in the strands with each bite you give him.

As you're making your way lower, one of his hands flits across your horn softly, his index and thumb making a ring and stroking near the base. You stop for a moment to moan loudly against his navel, never knowing it felt this good to have your horns played with (yeah, you'd touched them a couple of times in the past, but never when you were masturbating or anything, that would just be weird). He glides his hand up the length of the bone protrusion, stopping on the tip.

When you gain your sense about you, you move lower to take care of the fabric coming in between the two of you. You take the zipper of his pants into your teeth and start pulling it down. You look up at him while you do, and he's looking back at you, his eyes hazy. You delve a hand into the open space to free his erection, and he hisses when the cool air touches his bare skin.

He mutters your name as you start to stroke him. You have to use your other hand to hold his hip down as he starts to buck. You can't have him doing that when you take the next step. After a few more lazy movements of your hand, you slide your tongue along the head tentatively. He moans above you, and you feel the one hand begin to stroke your horn again, the other curling in your hair, pulling unconsciously.

You kiss your way down the length, taking your time as you make your way to the base. You're enjoying teasing him as he had done to you earlier. You linger for a moment, nipping the skin around his genitalia, and he tries bucking again, but you hold him down. You make your way back up the shaft and put your lips on the tip. You open up and start taking it into your mouth, running your tongue down the backside as you go.

"Oh, god, Gamzee!" he cries as you take him into your mouth. He abandons playing with your horn in favour of just holding onto it. You start working on his length, going up and down, slow at first, then picking up speed as you go on. You look up at him every now and again, but he's got his head thrown back into the ground, his mouth open in a wordless yell.

As you move along his shaft, you use the hand not trying to hold down his hips to run along his side and under his shirt, just touching any part of him you can. He pulls on your hair again, and you growl lowly at his insistence, but instead of getting the hint, he moans at the sound against him.

"Nngh, Gamz, please... don't..." He groans again. "Don't stop..."

In response, you speed up and take the bottom of his member in your hand to help things along. You try to time it so your lips and fingers meet in the middle in a continued rhythm. A few more moments of this, and he's practically writhing beneath you.

"Ga... ngh, god, I'm goi-"

You scrap your teeth against him gently, and that seems to be the last bit as he arcs into your mouth and releases. You do your best to get as much as you can, swallowing it as it comes. It's different than you thought it would be, the taste of it, but it's not that bad. You wipe away the excess from your chin as you raise up from your spot between his legs. His eyes are still closed, and he's trying to catch his breath. You move up his body, laying kisses up his body, across his chest, along his neck, and finally on his lips. He's hesitant to kiss you back at first, probably because of your taste, but he eventually does, he even gives you a flick of his tongue.

"That... tastes... odd," he gets out. You chuckle at him. You kiss him on the nose before helping him get everything back into his pants and zipping him up. He watches you kind of lazily at first, but then he leans up to lay a kiss on your neck. "I... I want to try something," he says hesitantly as he sits up so you two are eye-level.

You eye him funny, but shrug. "Sure thing, mother fucker."

He gives you a lopsided smile before he grips onto your horns again, raising on his knees so he's a little above you. He gently moves you, letting you follow where he's leading, until his head is in your hair again. He moves his fingers against the base of both, making a shudder go through you. He nuzzles your scalp affectionately, murmuring something that you can't quite catch.

You twitch when he starts kissing the area where your horn meets your scalp, much as you had before. You nuzzle into his shirt, wrapping your hands around his back. You let out a groan as you feel his teeth graze the bone. He's not doing anything too rough, but it's amazing. You don't realise you're gnawing at the fabric of his shirt until the taste of cloth is all you feel in your mouth.

"Fuck, Tav..."

He moves to the other horn, giving it the same treatment of kisses and nips, and you're moving him into your lap so you can gyrate against him, make him feel your want. He mewls against your scalp, stopping for a movement to move against you, more out of a primal instinct than being ready to go again.  
He moves so he can kiss you on the forehead, then your nose, then your lips, then further down. He lays kisses on your neck and throat, only nipping at the skin, no real biting. He's moving further down, adjusting himself so he is on his hands and knees in front of you, and oh god, if that isn't the hottest thing you've ever, you don't know what is. He looks up at you shyly with those expressive amber eyes, and he looks hesitant, and you want to tell him he doesn't have to, but at the same time, you really, really want him to...

He takes the decision from you as he leans in, kissing the bulge in your pants. He moves your thighs so your legs are spread before dipping his head down again to gently bite the fabric caging your member. God, he just loves teasing you. He's pulling at the hem of your pants, until your member is freed. He stops again, taking a moment to stare at the piece of flesh in front of him before he takes the top half of it into his mouth.  
You hiss at the sensation of his heat around you, and it's wonderful, so warm and velvety, and you just want more of him. You want to move your hips, but you know better, and you certainly don't want to gag him. He slowly goes down your length, adjusting to your size. He doesn't go down all the way the first time, but after moving up and down a few times, he gets closer and closer to engulfing all of you. You watch him as he goes, running a hand through his hair (there wasn't really enough for you to grab onto with both hands).

When his lips meet the base of your shaft, his eyes look up at you, and you were wrong, this is the hottest thing you've ever seen. You stroke the side of his face as he keeps going, and he keeps his eyes on you for the most part, occasionally turning his gaze back to the task at hand. Every time he looks at you, you're sure to lock eyes with him, make sure he knows you like him looking at you during this.

He keeps a hand near the base of your erection, angling your member as he goes. He picks up speed as he goes, probably helped by your constant groaning and terms of affection. You're building up, getting close already, probably from all the teasing you've had to endure all night. You grip the hair at the base of his skull, pulling in warning.

"Tavbro, fuck..."

That's the only warning you can give before you hit your orgasm. He tries to get out of the way, but some still finds its way in his mouth and a little on his face. He takes a moment to lick his lips, and he deliberates on the taste, before he puts his mouth on your slowly wilting erection to lick it clean. When he's done, he sits up fully, wiping his face with a handkerchief from his pocket.

"Thought the mother fucker tasted odd?" you taunt him.

He rolls his eyes. "Mine did. Yours tastes... different." He blushes. "Was that... did you like it?"

"It was a fucking miracle, Tavbro," he answer before leaning in for a kiss. He returns it before pulling away.

"I... really liked that," he admits timidly.

You think after blowing each other, he'd get past the embarrassment bullshit.

You pull him to you into a tight embrace, and he puts his arms around your neck, settling into your lap. You stay holding onto each other in silence, and at some point you both fall asleep next to the log. It's not for long because the nip of the night air won't let you both be comfortable for too long, but it's enough time for you to know you like holding him. You like having him next to you, you like the way his lips feel against yours.

And you don't want to let him go.

**::*~~*::**

The week that follows is amazing. You find that when you know where you stand with Tavros, it's easier for you to concentrate on your work at the big top. All of your chores are getting done with fervor, your act is amazing, and your dad seems to be increasingly happier with your improvement in behaviour. The spring in your step comes from knowing you get to see Tavros when you're done with your day.

Your father does mention at some point that he knows you've been sneaking out at night, but he doesn't really seem to mind much because it's no longer affecting your work. As long as you're on time for shows, he won't have to take it out on your hide. He does ask you what you've been doing, but you're not sure how to answer him. He has unfavourable opinions about carni-folk mixing with norms, so you don't want to give him a reason to allow you your leave of absence each evening. He doesn't push the matter, thankfully.

Your nights with Tavros are not much different than before, other than the occasion make-out session. You're still reading the books he gives you, still have long conversations into the night, go swimming now and again. You never want this to end, but reality comes in on you when you realise you only have about five more days together before your circus moves to a different town.

Tonight is a Friday night, and a big crowd is waiting for you and your fellow clowns. As you make your way into the centre ring, you look around at the audience, and in the front, there's Tavros, smiling at you. You can't help the grin that comes to you when you see him. He had said from the beginning he'd come to one of your shows, but this was the first time you'd seen him here.

You dedicate yourself to giving the best performance you've ever done, if only to impress your... well, whatever you two were to each other. The part of your act that had you pulling flowers out of your sleeve, you made sure to be next to him, so you could give the blossom to him, which he accepted with such a large smile. When you get back to the rest of the act, you notice your dad staring at you out of the corner of his eyes, and you can tell he saw, but you can't care.

When the show is over, you sneak away, missing the final bow to hide behind the entrance flap and wait. When you see your friend walk out, you wrap your arms around him from behind, tugging him back into the shadows of the tent. He yelps and struggles at first, until he realises it's you, and he instantly calms down.

He turns around in your arms, throwing his arms around your neck and giving you a kiss. He has a wide smile as he exclaims, "You were amazing, Gamz! And the rest of the show was great! The Birdman, the Wolf-girl, that blind chick..."

You grin as he goes on about the parts he liked, but he always circles around to say you were his favourite part. He's still holding onto the flower you gave him, and the petals are tickling the back of your neck from how he's holding it.

"Are we going to get going?" he asks.

You're about to agree with him, about to take him to the forest, when another idea comes to you. You two only have so much time together, and what better chance than this to... "What about my favourite mother fucker stay with me tonight?"

"W-what?"

"My tent is right the fuck there, we can stay up in that shit, and you can stay all night." You pull him closer, kissing him on his forehead. "I know you don't have mother fucking school tomorrow."

"I know I don't, but... are you sure it's a good idea...?" He looks nervous, his eyes flitting around you both, as if to make sure no one's going to see you.

"Please?" you ask, giving him your best puppy eyes.

He smiles slowly. "Okay, okay. One night should be fine..."

You grin, before taking his hand and leading him away. You sneak around the tents, staying to the shadows as you maneuver your way past anyone that could be looking. It's slower to get to your tent than if you went straight through, but you can only do so much.

When you both get to the tent, you pull back the flap and usher him in, following after. You lace it closed behind you, hanging a dark blue scarf on the outside, your universal symbol of 'fuck off' to everyone. When you turn around to Tavros, he's looking around, examining your 'room.' Being the son of the main clown came with the perk of having a bigger tent and not needing to share. It's set up with your different clown-y things, a pile of bicycle horns in one corner, some posters from various towns that feature you mainly on the image (your father insisted you keep them), bottles of Faygo (you loved the stuff, and stocked up on it whenever someone was going into town) laying around, and the place is in general a mess, but he doesn't seem to mind.

"What do you think?" you ask, walking up behind him and laying a hand on his shoulder. "Fucking miracles, or what?"

"It just seems very... hmm... you." He looks at you and smiles. He takes the hand on his shoulder and kisses it before sitting in the chair in front of your vanity. Your make-up is laying out, strewn haphazardly on the surface, and he inspects it with curiosity.

You sit down on the bed, a rather comfy thing compared to the others in the camp. You watch him for a moment as he plays with your white clown paint, putting a smudge on his face and inspecting it in the mirror. You smile as he does this, enjoying him taking part of your life, in some obscure fashion.

But it reminds you this is fleeting. Soon, you'll be gone, and you won't have him anymore. You don't know how to handle it. You may have only known each other for less than a month, but you feel closer to him than you have with anyone else.

You don't want to leave him.

"Hey, Tavbro."

He turns to you, a star on his cheek. "Yeah?"

"You ever think of running away to the circus?"

He stops playing with the make up, giving you a rather serious look. "What do you mean?"

"You know... maybe... coming with this band of mother fuckers?"

He's silent for a moment, thinking about what you're saying to him. "Gamzee... I... I can't just leave..."

"Why not?"

"What do you mean, 'why not'? Because I have a life here, I have school, I have-"

"If you have so much, why are you always spending time with this mother fucker?"

Amber eyes watch you for a moment, full of hurt at the comment. You don't mean it badly, but it was true.

"I know I don't have friends, but that doesn't mean there isn't something here for me."

"What's here for you? You know what'll be up and here for you if you stay? School and then college and some mother fucking dead end job where you're never happy."

He narrows his brows a little. "And if I go with you?"

"Everyday is fucking miraculous. We never worry about food, we've always got a place to sleep, and this is one big happy mother fucking family."

"What would I even do? I'm sure I can't stay just because you asked."

"Nah, but we'd find something a mother fucker can do."

"Gamz..." He shakes his head. "I... can't."

You frown. "Then... then why have we been doing all this?"

He stares at you, eyes wide. He takes a brief moment before getting up from the chair to sit next to you. He caresses your cheek, and you move into the touch, nuzzling the palm of his hand. You kiss the heel of his palm, looking him in the eyes. You're both quiet for a moment.

"Do you... really think I could do something here?"

You smile slowly. "Everyone can do something, it's a fucking thing of miracles."

He leans over to rest his head on your shoulder. You kiss his forehead, and he's quiet again.

"Maybe... maybe a mother fucker could just think about it?"

He nods into your neck. "I'll think about it."

You don't feel very reassured by that, but let it go for now.

You tilt your head to lay a kiss on his nose. He smiles and moves so he can kiss you on the lips. It's a slow movement, just your lips fitting together and moving. You break away only slightly to kiss him around his mouth, laying one right atop his lips before moving in for another one full on. You're both adjusting so you're not at an odd angle as the kiss deepens. He opens his mouth almost instantly when your tongue skims his lips.

It isn't long before you two are laying down in your bed on your sides, kissing each other. Your hand is under his shirt, roaming the skin hidden under the cloth, and his are in your hair. You pull on his hair gently to tilt his head back so you can get to his neck, kissing and biting the smooth skin as you go. When you bite a little harder, one of his hands goes from your hair to your one of your horns, playing with the base. An animalistic sound comes from your throat, and you roll so you're on top of him, getting better access to his throat. You can only bend so far down, though, your horns digging into the pillows Tavros is laying on (Tavros fits so well between them, you hardly have to worry about hurting him) keep you from getting all the ways you want to go.

He still has a hand on one of your horns, which is driving you crazy. Your hands are pushing his shirt up, scratching lightly at his ribs. He's making little noises beneath you, and it's only adding to your frustration. You pull on his shirt, tugging it up. He gets the hint and leans up, helping you take off the article of clothing. He reaches forward and starts pulling off yours, which you let him get you out of. Both shirtless, you return your attention to his neck, making sure to leave a mark. If you weren't going to see him again, you were damn sure people would know he was with you, even for a little while.

You reach down to the cloth between the two of you and start to rub him through his pants. He's already half-hard, and making louder noises as you go on. You unbutton them and pull down the zipper, sneaking your hand under the fabric to touch him. He moans, and you kiss him to quiet him.

"As much as I love that mother fucking voice of yours, Tav," you say, still stroking him as you speak, which only makes him mewl again, "you have to keep it down. We don't need any of those mother fuckers coming in, do we?"

"Maybe we shouldn't-"

You stop moving your hand and just look at him.

He blushes.

"I know," he says softly. "I... I want to, too."

You smirk. You go back to kissing him, flicking your wrist along his length. You pause for a moment to work on his pants and boxers, removing them. When you get to his ankles, he toes off his shoes so you can fully remove the clothing. You stop to just admire him for a moment, this is the first time you've seen him completely naked. He's beautiful, all of him.

You kiss him again, deepening it right away. You feel his tongue move against yours and his hand is under the hem of your pants. He's pulling them down past your hips, and you move momentarily to remove them. You're on top of him again, and your erection rubs against his, making you both moan. You go back to sloppy kissing as you move against each other, grinding your hips in a wonderful way.

He runs his nails down your back, and lift him up, putting his legs around your back side. You move your length along his crack, a delicious feeling. His head is rolled against the pillow, his eyes scrunched up with lust.

"Gamzee..." he breathes haughty.

"Yeah, I know..."

You bend over to reach between your mattress and frame, pulling out a little bottle. You're a teenage boy, you know, you have things for this kind of thing. You squeeze out a bit onto your fingers, rightly greasing them up before putting more on your palm, stroking your own member a few times. You poke at Tavros' entrance, looking at him as you do so. He winces as you slide your middle finger into him.

You lean over him, kissing him on the cheek. "I'll make it as best as I can before I'm all up in there and shit," you whisper into his ear.

He nods, laying a kiss on your neck. "I know, Gamz..."

You start moving your finger in and out, slowly at first, so he can get used to the intrusion. When you feel he's ready, you put in your index, still pumping, but stretching a bit, too. He's moaning and twitching underneath you, and his discomfort only seems mild now.

There's one particular thrust you do that arcs his back and he lets out something loud. You stop instantly, not sure if you hurt him or not.

He opens his eyes to look at you when you're no longer moving. He gives you a shaky smile. "That... that felt really good..."

You chuckle before moving again, trying to hit him the same way, and he groans again. He's trying to move with you, trying to get that same spot. You think of the angle your fingers are at, so you can try for it again here in a moment. You kiss him again, if only to quiet him.

When you think he's ready you remove your fingers. You grip his hips and position the time of your cock to his entrance. You lean over, rolling up his backside some, so you're eye-to-eye. "This... this is probably going to hurt my mother fucker, so... if you need to, bite up on me or something, okay?"

He nods in affirmative. You meet his lips with yours as you begin to slowly enter him. You feel him whimper into your mouth, and you stop momentarily, letting the half of you that's inside of him become familiar. He takes your suggestion, and moves to your neck, biting down softly at first, but when you start to move again, he bites down harder. You work your way inside of him, and as you go, his teeth sink into you. You're sure he's going to draw blood if he keeps at it, and you start to worry it's too much for him.

"Should I stop...?"

He shakes his head against your neck, momentarily taking his teeth from you. "No, it's... it's fine. It's already starting to feel better..." He rolls his hips to emphasis his point, pushing you a little further into him. "...please?"

You lay a quick kiss to his lips before nodding. You push forward until you're fully inside of him. You're still for a moment, making sure he's okay. He nuzzles your neck, kissing you right below the jaw. "Keep going, Gamz... Please..."

You pull out until half of you is still in him, then you thrust back inside. He moans at first, then bites down on his thumb to quiet himself. You start moving in and out of him, taking a very slow pace at first. You can feel when he's adjusted to you, and can see it in his face when it goes from pain to pleasure. When it does, you pick up your pace, moving to a steady rhythm. He's trying to meet you half way, using his legs wrapped around your back for leverage.

Oh, god, he feels amazing. So tight and warm. He fits perfectly around you, and you start moving quicker, your body wanting to feel more of him. You wrap your hand around his neglected member, pumping it in time with your thrusts. He's writhing, trying to get as much of you in him as he can. You lift him up a bit, angle him, trying to get him the way you had before. It takes a few experimental thrusts, but you know when you hit it when he throws his head back, turning his head in time to yell your name into the pillow.

You keep at the same pace, hitting that area in him over and over while still stroking him. He's trying to keep up with you, but you can tell he's losing it. He's making more noises, using the pillow under his head to muffle his screams of pleasure. And as much as you want this to last longer, you can feel the coil inside of you wanting to unwind.

"Gamzee--" he calls out, moving for a moment to get your attention. "I--"

Before he can finish, he's arcing into your thrust, and you feel his orgasm wrack through his small frame. He spills himself on your hand and stomach. The muscle around your cock tightens, and you can only do a few more thrusts before you reach your own climax. You bury yourself deep inside of him as you fill him with your seed. You lean down to kiss him as you milk the last of it into him.

Spent, you collapse next to him, and you're both panting and trying to catch your breath. You pull him into your arms, holding him tightly as you come back from your euphoria. You two readjust so you're spooning him, giving you a way to nuzzle the back of his neck.

You're going to drift to sleep soon, you know, but you keep a moment of clarity to say something. "Tav?"

"Yeah, Gamzee?" he responds through a yawn.

"Think about it?"

He takes one of your hands and kisses it. "I will."

**::*~~*::**

Tonight is the last night you will be in this city. You've performed your act with less than stellar flourishes, your mind elsewhere. The past two nights, Tavros hasn't been at your usual meeting spot, and you just don't know what to think about it. You were wanting to spend every night you could with him, especially since this would be your last few days together.

Your father has noticed the change in your behaviour. You went from being a perfect son and performer to suddenly dejected, it stood out to him. He tried again to talk to you about it. He asked you if it was a girl. You told him it wasn't. He asked if it was a boy. When you didn't instantly answer, he just took that for what it was.

Your follow-up question was about bringing in a stray.

He just stared at you blankly for several moments before saying, "He'd better be fucking useful, Gamzee."

And that was all he had to say on the matter.

When you get to the log that night, he's waiting there for you. You run to him the moment you lay eyes on him, tackling him off his seat, and you both fell on the ground. He yelped as he landed, but you were kissing him before he could say anything.

"Gam--" You interrupt him with a kiss. "Gam--!" You cut him off again. He finally gets you away enough to speak. "Gamzee!"

"Where has my favourite mother fucker been?" you ask without thinking.

He's quiet for a moment, just staring up at you with those amber eyes. Those beautiful amber eyes, and this may be the last night you see them.

"I... I had to think."

"About what?"

He pushes you again. You stand up and help him to his feet. He looks at you with a meaningful look before reaching to the other side of the log. He pulls up a backpack that looks over-filled and bursting at the seems. You raise an eyebrow as he puts it in front of you.

"What's that about?"

"I... I've decided to... you know..." He rubs the back of his neck, swallowing thickly. "I want to go with you, Gamzee. You know... run away to the circus?"

You just stare at him, eyes wide. "...mother fucker, really?"

He looks unsure suddenly. "You... you wanted me to, didn't you?"

You rush him, grabbing him by the middle and lifting him in the air in a great big bear hug. You spin him around, laughing as you twirl.

"Gamzee, put me down! Gamzee!" He's struggling, though it's not really stopping you in your excitement.

You finally slow down and set him on the ground, smothering his face and neck in kisses. He's able to return some of them, but he can't quite keep up with you.

"Miracles," you mutter against his lips. "Mother fucking miracles, that's what."

He chuckles. "Yeah, miracles," he agrees before kissing your cheek. "So... you're still sure about this?"

"Tavbro, I've never been more sure of anything in my mother fucking life."

He smiles. "Then... we should be going, right?"

You grin. "In a mother fucking bit."

He's about to question you when you silence him with a kiss.  
.fin.


End file.
